- Sep 9, 2024
- 709
- 1,290
Hey @FutureTraineeMaybe I empathize with how disappointed and frustrated you must be feeling, and the first thing I will say is that these are very normal and natural sentiments to have right now. It is a uniquely painful experience that I have also gone through a number of times in my life - to have gotten so close to such an important goal for you only to feel like you failed at the finish line. I remember in my case I felt simultaneously defeated and resentful, angry both at myself and the world for all my efforts having been in vain. And worse than all, I remember this awful recurring idea that I was just not "good enough" when so many around me were, which is one that can so easily eat away at one's sense of self-worth.Just had my final rejection post-AC. I'm genuinely at a loss on what to do now..
So I know this is a very difficult mental space to be in, one that can't simply be solved by one well-worded encouragement post which reiterates that "all will be fine in the end". That said, I will tell you a bit about what I learnt from my own experience. Firstly, your work has not gone to waste. While they may have not ended up with the result you hoped for at the moment you hoped for it, your efforts have helped you develop in many ways you may not be seeing right now. Having gone through this application cycle, you will have learnt so much that you did not know before: how to research a firm in depth, how to write exceptional applications, how to progress through second stages, how an interview and an AC works. The very fact that you have gotten to the AC stage is already clear proof you have managed to become one of the very best candidates out of a huge pool. That is, believe me, no small feat: I know dozens of extremely talented people at UCL that have failed to get even one AC over several cycles. When you apply again, you will start from a so much stronger a position than you did at the beginning of this cycle. Your success chances will be all that higher; most people I know who end up rejected post-AC in one cycle end up getting a VS the following one.
The second thing I will say is that your experience throughout this application cycle, and particularly in dealing with the aftermath of this rejection, will form your character in invaluable ways. If I had not gone through similar experiences, I would be a significantly less resilient, adaptable, and empathetic person than I am now. While these are attributes that may sound too intangible and abstract to do much to console you now, believe me when I say that developing them is an invaluable benefit which will help you in so many areas of your life. I do not regret my experiences of rejection, and if I had a choice, I would not choose to have avoided going through them. All this is to say, your work has not all been for nothing - you will likely be both a stronger candidates and stronger person because of it. Feeling this disappointment is natural, and you should allow yourself the time to do it. However, remember you have all the proof you need that you are "good enough" and that you have all it takes to succeed. And know that if you keep moving forward, there is nothing that can stop you from getting to it!