I think at the end of the round of applications just gone I said to my girlfriend that I don't know what I'll do if I don't get a TC this time around. I was probably lower than ever and I think the mere thought of the interviews started to make me tear up.
Turns out, I just started them again!
She is definitely the person most instrumental in getting my mental health back in shape, especially as my most recent time in Geneva coincided with the interview rejections. I was seeing LinkedIn posts from friends who interviewed at the same firm get a TC, I was seeing friends start their TCs and my anxiety just kept going up and up and up.
What she told me was undoubtedly something I had managed to either ignore previously or never heard: you are not everyone else.
As many others above have said, there is no-one we should ever compare ourselves to; we rarely see what has happened in their lives that spurs them on, we never see the moments where their lives get put on hold for one reason or another. As I was reminded at the Legal Cheek event last night, nobody's story is ever the same as the story before or after it, and that is absolutely fine.
It's especially helpful, as Alice mentioned, that this is a genuinely welcoming and supportive community. At no point have I ever seen anyone boastful about their success and I have never seen anyone be nasty because someone hasn't quite perfected their application form technique. It's a safe space to come to because we're all in the same boat but each with a different story and different motivators. We all have our different criteria on what makes an ideal firm and it's genuinely so incredible to see such a diverse range of options being explored.
These are just some of the ways that, on reflection, have helped me come out of the other side of an incredibly tough few months:
1. Like Alice, I rediscovered my love of reading. Given the fact that I seem to forget to charge my phone every time I fly to Geneva, having a good book is always important so this is more or less an enforced change for the better! I have a stack of unread books in my room that I am slowly but surely getting to but rediscovering this love of reading has been immeasurably beneficial. Rather than sitting in front of my laptop for hours on end, I'll take a book wherever I can. In Geneva, this means a spot next to the lake; at home, this means sitting with my brother or the dogs or my mum. (Picking up
Heroes by Stephen Fry hasn't helped my Assassin's Creed Odyssey obsession though...)
2. Finding new things to try out. At university, I loved doing this. I was a salsa dancing, photo taking, board gaming playing law society president. When I worked, I couldn't keep these up due to the demands of the sector and my own circumstances. What did I end up doing? I accidentally fell down a hole of discovering a love of
Dungeons and Dragons via my favourite video game voice actors. They play every week and their backstories, performances and hilariousness make listening to the podcasts so much fun when I'm out and about. Luckily, my brother knows some people who play and I'll hopefully get to try it (if anything to imagine how amazing being a voice actor would be). Thanks to my girlfriend's love of discovering new things, I've rediscovered and old hobby: salsa! Having these new/old-new things to look forward to has kept my mind busy and kept me from focussing on the hectic nature of applications.
3. Realising that there's more to life than an application. This one is rather self-explanatory and something that, somehow, I lost sight of. Despite my numerous misfortunes with health, I still took each rejection as some door slamming shut. In fact, not only have I discovered the sort of firm I want to apply to, but I've also come back to realise that life is honestly not long enough to worry yourself sick over applications. They're important to our future careers, but the most important thing in the present is one's health.
4. Getting back into the swing of things. As I simply never had the time at work, I could never attend events at the firms that I want to meet and I do feel like that to me, my commercial awareness and understanding of these firms deteriorated. Attending the Legal Cheek event with
Clyde & Co last night really made me feel like I was back at university and I thoroughly enjoyed it. Learning about a new firm initiative or networking is something I actually missed, so getting back into the swing go things really helped.
5. "The greatest wealth is health". I've stolen this from a gym I used to go to but it honestly is the absolute truth. This is the same as 3 but without a shadow of a doubt, never put your health on the back burner. If you feel like you need some quality me-time, then take it. If you're at capacity at work, mention it to your supervisor. Never feel like you have to work at 300% capacity as nobody can; burnout is a real issue.
This community is filled to the brim with incredible, hard working and determined people and everyone deserves the absolute best out of life. If anyone has been through the struggles of health issues or other personal circumstances that have affected your health, or just need someone to talk to, or even just someone who can send you adorable pictures of puppies*, please feel free to message me when you want.
One day in several years time, we'll all be sat in our dream firms - it's a matter of when, not if. <3
*I have an overwhelming surplus of pictures that I fear I have more pictures of my dogs than anything else.
